life-altering-things

Conversation

Wed, 10 Mar 2010 04:08:52 +0100

As I listen to the conversation its like music to my ears.
"That was a hell of a move tonight."
Soon as it left my mouth I knew it.
"I'm talking about afterwards."
I know I know I was sorry.
"You've got to be careful because if not that temper of yours is all that you will have left."
I don't think people are going to forgive me for some of the mistakes I have made along the way.
"The important thing is for you yourself to get past them all. You have to live better its not just going to go away."
"Son I just don't want you to look back in a couple of years and wonder what might have been."
"By the way just for the record hell of a move."
So where does this descion rank?
"haha well somewhere up there."
There are more important things in life than.................
So I think I know what I am going to do then.
"Hell of a move, hell of a move. Son you've got to be careful we all know where that path can lead you."
......................
..............................................
I guess we will see then wont we?

What I Think About?

Tue, 09 Mar 2010 03:03:49 +0100

What do you think about when you wake up?
What is your first thought?
Unfiltered untainted and true.
The very first thing.
Think about what it is and smile remember it and keep it in your mind.
Ask yourself what is anyone you knows first thought.
I bet you can't answer so lets not pretend like anyone really knows anyone.
Because the only person who truely knows you is you.
.....................
.......................
Shahnaz
Shes the first thing I think about everyday
How is she?
Does she miss me like I miss her?
Does she forgive me?
How do I get her back?
What do I say or do to make it right?
Was she the one?
Was I her one?
Is there even really a one?
If so how do you know when they are there?
What do you say to the one?
How does the one see you in there eyes?
What do I see in their eyes?
.......... And then another day without her begins

Echo

Tue, 23 Feb 2010 20:27:29 +0100

I did it to myself
Now I'm all by myself
Acting like you hate me
You played me too
Now there's nobody left
To hear me
All you're hearing is your own
Echo
It started off great
But who was to know
That love that is lost
Cannot be let go
You say it's my fault
Ok then i'll go
It's better to know
Now there's nobody to argue with
Cause i'm not home
Disgusted with trust
I trust no one no more
Just went with the flow
Found myself on the floor
When you went away
All my pain went astray
Like it's a new day
Now i have no one to argue with
Cause I'm not home
And your all alone
Hearing your own damn
Echo
Your own damn
Echo
No one is near you
No one can hear you
With your own damn
Echo!
All night long
I thought to myself
Why would i stay with you
Realized that you were the one
So why do i miss you?

Gorilla Zoe Echo

Time

Tue, 23 Feb 2010 02:17:43 +0100

As my clock ticks on
As the time passes me by
As my life spins wildly out of control
As everything begins to unwind and break
As time goes by distance grows
As time goes by only I know
As my life starts to flash infront of me
As I have lived my last 25 years
As it feels now only like a moment
As now the moment I just felt writing this is gone
As I did exist in that moment
As I still exist in that moment as well as the next
As well as the future and the past
As I live my life I wonder what the purpose may be
As I walk down the street I wonder who am I supposed to meet
As I talk I wonder to myself who is supposed to hear
As I listen I wonder to myself is this where I am supposed to obtain my knowledge
As I sit alone I wonder to myself why
As I think back to previous pain the tears begin to flow like rain
As I contemplate my future I smile through the darkness and pain
As I look to a place where I have yet ventured
As I look to a place unknown...............

And on the otherside.......................... My existance my past my present my now and my future

Faith

Mon, 22 Feb 2010 02:16:01 +0100

John Hiatt - Have A little Faith In Me Lyrics

When the road gets dark
And you can no longer see
Just let my love throw a spark
And have a little faith in me
And when the tears you cry
Are all you can believe
Just give these loving arms a try
And have a little faith in me

Have a little faith in me
Have a little faith in me

And when your secret heart
Cannot speak so easily
Come here darling, from a whisper start
And have a little faith in me
And when your back's against the wall
Just turn around and you, you will see
I will catch you, I will catch your fall
Just have a little faith in me

Have a little faith in me
Have a little faith in me

Cause I've been loving you, for such a long, long time
Expecting nothing in return
Just for you to have a little faith in me
You see time, time is our friend
Cause for us, there is no end
And all you gotta do, is have a little faith in me
I will hold you up, I will hold you up
And your love, gives me strength enough to
Have a little faith in me
Hey hey
All you gotta do for me girl
Is have a little faith in me

Finally

Tue, 16 Feb 2010 21:55:06 +0100

Ok honestly not having you be in my life is killing me I hate it so much and I would really like you to be there I dont know the logistics or how we can work it out but I really miss you alot and I want you to be a part of my life I hate not talking to you and having you around it really sucks and it hurts alot maybe I am not the best at planning a future and all of that but I do know that I want you in my life and thats it for now I dont know anything else about anything other than the fact that I love you and that I want to be with you thats all I know right now and thats it I hope that is good enough cause its good enough for me to say that I love you and I want to be with you and that maybe love isnt enough but I love what we had and I want it back and I think that it is enough I think that the only thing you really need is love everything else is left for the mind to contimplate so I say I love you and I am not worried about the other stuff I miss you and I would really like you back ........

Lyrics to Happiness :
Happiness is just outside my window
Would it crash blowing 80-miles an hour?
Or is happiness a little more like knocking
On your door, and you just let it in?

Happiness feels a lot like sorrow
Let it be, you can't make it come or go
But you are gone- not for good but for now
Gone for now feels a lot like gone for good

Happiness is a firecracker sitting on my headboard
Happiness was never mine to hold
Careful child, light the fuse and get away
‘Cause happiness throws a shower of sparks

Happiness damn near destroys you
Breaks your faith to pieces on the floor
So you tell yourself, that's enough for now
Happiness has a violent roar

Happiness is like the old man told me
Look for it, but you'll never find it all
Let it go, live your life and leave it
Then one day, wake up and she'll be home
Home, home, home
[ Happiness Lyrics on http://www.lyricsmania.com/ ]

The Old Blanket

Tue, 02 Feb 2010 11:47:04 +0100

The old woman starts to knit. First, she takes her materials and prepares them. As she begins to feed the thread through just as the old blanket was used to being put together and pieced in the right way, it happened. This time it wasn’t looked at as the blanket anymore because this blanket needed to be re-stitched due to wear and tear. Yes, this blanket had some holes and rips in it. But, instead when the thread began to be feed through this time it wasn’t feed through with as much care as it was when it was first woven. In fact the old woman did not even pay attention to what her complacency in her weaving was doing to this old blanket. She never even looked at it. She had become so used to it just being the same old blanket that she just started weaving away as if she knew what she was doing. As if it was no big deal at all. The only thing is that the old blanket knew the care and compassion that was first put into it. The old blanket felt the difference with each knit that went through it. The weaves now felt as if they were piercing through the blanket with a sharp tear. Not weaving into it and a gentle rhythmic flow. No, these knits were actually reweaving the blanket but the color was not the same and neither was the attention nor detail or soft hands and gentle touch. Which were put into it this time. This time the old lady seemed in a hurry to throw it together as if it weren’t as important as it once was. The blanket being a blanket never said anything and looked as if everything was ok. Well to everyone it was on the outside. But inside, well that’s a whole different story. Because my friends on the inside there was a whole different story. The threads of the blanket were beautiful on the top layer they shined and shimmered with new colors. But, deep down the blanket knew what and why it was done that way. The funny part however is we all know that blankets can’t talk and neither did this one this blanket just lay and wait to be used and handled in the same way that it once was quietly, patiently, and painfully. The old blanket should be remembered for what it is….. For what it once was recognized for. Remember the blanket cant always talk but sometimes all it takes is a second look to see the blanket for what it is that same old blanket that it was in the beginning.

When Im Gone

Wed, 13 Jan 2010 02:03:39 +0100

I'm still hurtin' from the last time
You walked on this heart of mine
I can't find much to believe in
You let me down so many times
Heaven knows how I love you
But I'm tired of holding on
You better kiss me
'Cause your gonna miss me when I'm gone

Not much chance we're gonna make it
If I'm the only one who's trying
You know I'm running out of reasons
And we're running out of time
Someday, girl, you're gonna wake up
And wonder what went wrong
You better kiss me
'Cause your gonna miss me when I'm gone

You're good at going through the motions
All I hear are alibis
Not I get this empty feeling
When I look into your eyes
I don't see a love light shining
I don't know what's going on
You better kiss me
'Cause your gonna miss me when I'm gone

You better kiss me
'Cause your gonna miss me when I'm gone

You better kiss me
'Cause your gonna miss me when I'm gone

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SH_ZzkXag9w
Brooks and Dunn

What You Want

Tue, 05 Jan 2010 07:48:03 +0100

You think about her much?
Everyday everyday.
One of these days your going to wake up and your going to realize how much I love you and when you do I will still be waiting for you.
Because the answer is still everyday.
Yes the answer to the question you asked me I can give it to you because you deserve it.
But, the real answer is because I want it and I want you.
Miss you, want you, love you, yearn for you, ache for you, think of you, daydream of you, you, you, you.

Washing The Heart

Tue, 05 Jan 2010 06:54:04 +0100

Washing away the color fades off. The silence lingers, the questions unanswered. It starts to wash away my heart. The rag that is used is brittle and scratches away pieces of me. As it’s rung out the blood of my heart spills on the floor. I ask myself each time can my heart take anymore, each time that it happens it crashes to the floor. The blood and the pieces laying there while I still stand. I start to clean it up all this blood now in my hands. I have begun to wonder to myself how many more times can I put it together before I have no more. The silence and lack of answers tear each time a little more. If you only knew what the silence does to it when I say I will let you go it cracks a bit. It seems to be less and less noticed with each passing day. But, this thing is starting to get so easy for you to look away and your mind lead astray. Not seeing the pain it builds with each passing day. I wish you would stop speaking everything after its worked through your mind what comes from the heart is what I wish for. It seems like I don’t get it as much anymore it washes away and scrubs at my heart. I wish you could see what I am asking for but with each passing day it washes away yes it washes away on my heart.